Happy Holidays!!!

It's that time of the year when families come together from wherever they are and spending time catching up on the activities that have happened within the last year. I am in that in between stage where I don't have my own family and still spend the holidays with my parents, grandparents, aunts, uncles, and cousins. This year was just like any other. I am just happy that we all had one good gathering before we lost a family member. People are getting older and it's hard to imagine what it would be like without them around during the holidays. We've lost 3 in the battle and as the days go by it is difficult but at least I know they are better off where they are.

As I get older, I find that finding time to spend with friends becomes even harder. We are all spread across the world. It was great seeing the majority of my friends so far this holiday season. Although they weren't the best of predicaments, drunk in the club, it was fun nonetheless. Hopefully, we will find time for each other at least once a year to sit around and reminisce about the "golden days".


--Until Next Year

Permanence

Yesterday I was talking to a future awesome film director about random shit and he helped me to understand that I will not make plans for my life. More so I will have directions in which will help guide me along. Directions can change unexpectedly due to traffic, congestion, or construction (metaphorically speaking). Plans, however, do not change so easily and they usually never work out for me. Directions I dig, plans not so much.
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I know this blog was supposed to be me posting my awesome pictures but I just haven't been inspired lately. I never pick up my camera anymore. Idk why. I used to love that thing and never went anywhere without it. Now, it's just one of the many things that I have yet to unpack from my old life. I must unpack everything because I'm staying for a while longer and because I don't feel like an inhabitant but a passerby.


--To Things More Permanent

Weekly Update #1

So, I haven't written in a little over a week and thought that I will do weekly updates if I don't write within the week.
Since last Friday, my phone has been cut off, my brother and everyone else has begun to come home for Christmas break, I have been to 2 graduations-one with an awesome friendly gathering after, and broke my phone.
The last thing is the most disturbing. I cannot hold on to electronics for too long. My Tilt has a crack in the screen and is only being used as a phone--placing and receiving phone calls. I have modified my Christmas and Birthday lists so that I get enough money to buy me a new phone. Looks like every time it rains it pours and I mean torrential down pours.
On a better note I am going to a party with JP tonight for her job, then hopefully a show tomorrow and my birthday is on Tuesday. As long as I can stop the bad things from happening for a week or two life will be great.

--Happy and Hopeful

Moving On

So after so many letdowns in the last 2 weeks I think that there is a chance that happines my be coming my way. I got a call for an interview to substitue teach today. And I now think I know what am going to do. I usually never plan things but this time it came to me in a moment of true clarity.
It may sound weird but I have to go somewhere where I know no one. I figure that this summer I will move to a city where I don't know a soul. That way I will have no one to blame for my sucky ass life but me. No friends or family to let me down or decide what I do. I think this is what I need: complete and total independence. No one hovering, asking questions, or anything else.
Let's see where shall I go? I always wanted to live on the West Coast. So maybe I'll do Portland or Seattle. California might be too much for me now.
This will probably disappoint a lot of people especially my friends and family in D.C. I really want to move out of my parent's home but I think this is exactly where I need to be for just a little while longer. I feel like there is a lesson here that I must learn before I move on.

The only thing left is to way and see how it all plays out.

--Constantly Confused

Great Ideas Gone to Waste

So I had something I wanted to write about but I can't for the life of me remember what it was. It could have been something I could change someone's life with ot changed my own. I have to stop this, getting wasted. Maybe not. It's so much fun. Well I can say that I am excited about going to see Envy on the Coast and Taking Back Sunday tommorow. Hopefully, I get a good pic of Envy and I will post it here about the same time tommorow.

Quintessential

John Cusack is an indie demi-god. He always plays the quirky, smart guy who is totally in love with the girl. To ultimately win her affection, he goes above and beyond the standard dating norms. To quote DAJ, "He's not super cute, but he has this nice-guy/indie coolness that I like. I'd want my own John Cusack like Fall Out Boy sang." And I definitely agree.

I was watching Must Love Dogs at about 1:00 a.m. on Saturday, technically Sunday, and thought how much I would like my very own John Cusack. But which one? Do I want John Cusack as: Lloyd Dobler in Say Anything or Rob Gordon in High Fidelity or Jonathan Trager in Serendipity or David in Martian Child? All of them are great guys and have something that each and every woman would love.


--Blown Back

Damn It to Hell!!!!!!

So I was supposed to go see Fall Out Boy today but as always something had to go wrong. First, nature came for a visit and I can barely sit up let alone stand up for hours. Second it is cold as all hell outside as well as snowing. Since, I can't go see FOB, I will see Taking Back Sunday and Envy on the Coast in Columbia on the 10th. Then 2*Sweet on the 20th.


--Not So Sweet Shit

And maybe we were made for each other...

So I have been on a quest for a chair. Why? Well, I figure that in the evening after a long day at work what would I have to look forward to when I got home. Maybe a significant other or a roommate or a pet. But what if there is no one/nothing else...if it is only you. And your chair. Sure there is a bed but I don't plan on having a television in my bedroom. So when I have a stressed day at work, I hope to come home and collapse in this great chair and read, watch TV, drink, text...my life away.

I feel that this chair encapsulates my entire personality. Dark but comforting, although I have never sat in it. I just really think this one is for me. Well actually there is another chair I have my eye on but that will be for guest as well as add interest to my living room.

I have a chair. Now I need a city, an apartment, and a living room to put it in.

--Can You Feel the Love?

Life is a Maze, and Love is a Riddle...

http://www.myspace.com/lenkamusic.

Quote the Week [Not of, But about/for]

Brother: You moved my car??
Me: Naw.
Brother: Did Daddy move my car?? (leaves house)
Dad (outside raking leaves): I got in your car and it smells like smoke.
Brother: It always smells like that. I told you.
Dad: Naw, that's FRESH!!

Marty Feldman thought...

"I am too old to die young, and too young to grow up." I agree with his sentiments there at the end.

--Top Colloquialism

Picture to come soon

I'm Coming Back/My Own Tutor

So, I decided today that I will return to my past life, at least kinda. I get Tre and Kath back. Baltimore is not too far (The Ottobar mostly :]). 9:30 Club, The Black Cat, The Rock and Roll Hotel, Singapore Bistro, Cosi, and of course those doobies. I have tentatively accepted my old position at the National Medical Association but this time I will have more responsibilities. I am so excited that I will be leaving home again--for good (I hope).

On another note I just got me a tutor for that damn actuarial test that I am terrified to take. Some guy named Brandon with a Master's in Mathematics, and he teaches at Forest Park Community College. $20/hour...at least I am not paying for it nor am I looking forward to it. I hope for my sake that he is the dorkiest, most unattractive person so that I can actually learn something.

--Going Back/Going Home

Welcome

Clear blue skies, wispy white clouds, brick-colored rowhouses. This is what I left behind 3 months ago after I finished school and returned home. Welcome to my life. That picture was taken on my last day in the city that I spent 4 years and have so many great memories and made so many great friends. Washington, D.C. Not a day goes by that I don't miss my old life. Although I was in school, life couldn't have been better. I felt I had it all or at least it felt like it. Well, that was then and this is now. I am no chameleon, but I am trying.

--Sad in the City